Movie Review: The Love Guru

    

The Love Guru
2008, 88mins, PG-13
Director: Marco Schnabel
Writer (s): Pam Gordy, Mike Myers
Cast includes: Mike Myers, Jessica Alba, Justin Timberlake, Romany Malco, Meagan Good, Verne Troyer
UK Release Date: 20th June 2008

Returning to the screen for the first time in live action form for five years, Mike Myer’s The Love Guru was set to launch the comedian back to the top of the funny list and reclaim his box-office crown following hits like Wayne’s World and the Austin Powers series. Sadly for Myers the movie pulled in disappointing figures on its opening weekend and was critically scoffed by the majority, alot suggesting that in a year of bad comedies The Love Guru was still bottom of the dumpster stuff. I’m not really going to argue any differently, the movie isn’t quite amongst the years least amusing comedic efforts but it’s over reliance on obvious and crude gags along with its leading mans lazy performance render The Love Guru never better than mediocre and occasionally much less.
The plot is dull and unengaging, Guru Pitka (Mike Myers) is widely regarded as the world’s second best love guru, after the legendary Deepak Chopra. In a bid to escalate himself to the top and appear on Oprah Pitka agrees to help Jane Bullard (Jessica Alba) resolve a problem which has been crushing her hockey team the Toronto Maple Leafs into a string of defeats. Their star player Darren Roanake (Romany Malco) has lost his ability on the Ice following a public break-up with his girlfriend Prudence (Meagan Good) and herr dating a well endowed French hockey player Jaques “le Coq” Grande (Justin Timberlake). Thus Pitka sets out to set the pair together once more, and grant the Maple Leafs a chance to win the coveted Stanley cup.
With a set-up that lazy a predictable the film’s success was going to be totally dependent on its ability to parody the craze which has accompanied “self help” Guru’s in recent years. Sadly Myers and fellow scribe Pam Gordy attack the idea in an unconvincing and toothless fashion, there are small samples of effective satire but for the most part it’s limp and deadly obvious. At the films start a scene featuring Jessica Simpson and Val Kilmer playing themselves suggests the picture has a keen idea of what direction to take the satire in, but as the runtime goes by so to it appears does Myers and Gordy’s eye for any sort of sharp observation.
In the lead role Myers is irritating and almost seems to be playing Austin Powers in Indian drag and with an odd accent, the same bawdy innuendos and screen hogging that marked that character pretty much make up the core DNA of Guru Pitka aswell. I’ll not deny that he throws up a few entertaining moments but those hoping to see the Canadian comic doing something new or fresh will be bitterly disappointed with Myer’s reliance on old acts. As a love interest of sorts Jessica Alba once again looks good but with a character this dull and a script this flat Alba can’t even ride her looks and charms to a passable performance. In last year’s marginally better Good Luck Chuck Alba was one of the comedies best assets; here she’s just too bland for the audience to warm to her. Romany Malco is once again solid as the troubled hockey star whilst Meagan Good brings more eye candy but virtually nothing else. Both Verne Troyer and Timberlake like Myers supply a few chuckles but for the most part seem to be doing routines that others did better in the past. Timberlake in particular kept making me think of Sacha Baron Cohen in Talladega Nights, the difference being that when Cohen did it, the audience found it original and most importantly amusing. The same just can’t be said for pop star turned actor Timberlake.
The screenplay relies to heavily on crude gags to carry the viewing experience, and tellingly even at a minor 88 minutes the whole affair drags and endures numerous tedious stretches. The amount of references to the male reproductive organs and flatulence in the jokes is stunning, a few work but the majority sink quicker than the Titanic. Like most of Myer’s CV the picture has a relentless immaturity about it but previous works of equally lowbrow material where helped by intelligent writing and clever characters. The Love Guru lacks both, and is flatly directed by newbie helmer Marco Schnabel. To call Schnabel’s efforts workmanlike would simply not do service to how unremarkable and bland his direction is.
Myers fans might like The Love Guru a little better than most if not simply to see their hero in person once more. The rest of the public however will likely find the event largely unfunny and uninspired; if Myer’s is to recapture their cinematic buck he’d better come back with something much better next time around.